May 28, 2020

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Mets Fans, Chill Out… No Playoffs in your Future

By: Trent Pruitt

Alright Mets fans. Today is August 23rd, 2019. Your squad currently sits 1.5 games behind the Cardinals for the 2nd Wild Card position. You just swept one of the hottest teams in the league in the Cleveland Indians. I’ll agree with you, no one in their right mind thought that just under 130 games into the season, you’d be right in the thick of the playoff hunt. So congratulations on making it this far. I appreciate the fandom and I would be the same way if my favorite team was in your position – especially with all of the walk offs and the August that you guys are having. Well, I’m here to tell you to slow your roll and let’s check back into reality. 

1 – You’re the Mets. 

Simply put, you’re the Mets. If I know you guys, you’ll end up in the high 70’s/low 80’s win range and be standing around with your dicks in your hands just like the last few years. You should’ve sold at the deadline, collected what you could for Wheeler, Thor, and Matz, and built around Alonso for the future. 

2 – Your Lineup is Extremely Average.

McNeil fucks, Alonso fucks, JD Davis is on one right now. Other than that, I don’t think you guys have it. I like Conforto too, but after that, yikes. Cano was fun to watch – like 8 years ago. The Todd Father, that guy is not a playoff 3rd baseman at age 33. And the rest of those jokers, hate to break it to you but the Phillies, Brewers, Nats, and Cardinals all have better lineups than you. 

3 – Your Bullpen is Ass.

If you guys haven’t watched baseball over the last few years, bullpens are pretty important. Let me remind you of 2015 when you guys got dusted by the Royals in 5 games. They had Kelvin Herrera, Ryan Madson, and Wade Davis who just mowed people down on their way to hoist the Commissioner’s Trophy. You guys are far from that. The Mets own the 26th best bullpen in terms of ERA (5.10), 24th in batting average against (.262), and you have a share of the lead for most blown saves with 24. That won’t get you to October.

4 – Schedule.

It was fun to watch you guys beat up on the Marlins, Pirates x2, White Sox, and Royals. Asides from dismantling four of the bottom six teams in the league, let’s look at the future. You have 6 games against both the Braves and Phillies, 3 against the Nationals, Cubs, and Dodgers, and 4 against a decent DBacks squad. And there’s 3 at the Reds in which you better hope you don’t get Castillo or Gray. I’ll give you a sweep against the Fish and 2 out of 3 from the Rockies at Coors but these division games and games against division leaders are going to ruin you. That’s in all honesty, not even trying to poke fun anymore. 

5 – Oh, You’re the Mets.

Please remember your place.